the time i thought my parents were slow poisoning me ....

right from childhood ...I have a habit of talking stuff as I see it ….this habit made family friends ask me questions ...specifically me and questions was the norm …
and my replies used to get people laughing or talking or arguing about stuff ….
like once I told a friend of my father ...how he could not address me as Edi in Malayalam and to notice how my Dad, Never used Edi as a way to address me as other Mallu men did …. I was not yet 4 then and I remember loads of dialogues that ensued between said father's friend and my parents …
I was Pleaded with, by my parents, to Not talk to elder people the way I talk to my siblings and friends …
I did not get what the hullaboo was all about and life went on …
once when we went to someone's house ...they asked me ...who according to me ...my dad loved most amongst us siblings….I immediately said None of his children he loves and everyone was laughing and wanted to know Why ….ergo I said ...he spanks All 3 of us and the only person he doesn't spank ...his wife ….ergo he only loves the wife and not his kids … that had all of them guffawing

then I fell ill in 1st grade with some viral fever and it became serious and I missed school for quite some time …. the medicine I was prescribed by my fav paediatrician was a sweet pink syrup I loved very much and I got well slowly and went back to school...ergo I used to think good medicine is supposed to be sweet and a nice pink in colour … logic of a kid no

then in 3rd grade ..I fell ill again and this time it was serious …. I guess as per protocol my dad took me to a govt prescribed hospital called KEM ie king Edward memorial hospital in my city …. defence civilians had a few pvt hospitals they could go to for care of themselves and their dependents and they would get reimbursed for their expenses …my dad had recently fought with my fav hospital called Ruby Hall Clinic due to my mom's undiagnosed illness ...she had amebiasis and it was not diagnosed by ruby hall after 3 months of treatment and biopsy …

those KEM doctors did All kinds of internal examinations on me and Loads of Tests ...I hated Each one of them …. finally when the problem refused to heal ….
my dad took me to my Fav Paediatrician ...Dr Shirole near MG Road … I loved seeing the Synagogue on my way to the Doctor's ….that is my first memory of the Red Church(the synagogue) in Pune ….when I saw it ...I knew we had reached the doctor's place ….
he did nothing to me other than one checkup with Zero internal prodding ….and then he prescribed two medicines ….one- Seven Seas Cod Liver Oil and a big fat orange tablet that came in a brown glass bottle ....
I was to swallow both the medicines ...the seven seas capsules were ok ...however that horrendously big orange tablet was a freaking pain to ingest …. one day by Pure Chance I saw the word Poison printed on the brown bottle of orange tablets and I thought a bit
then I went and read the bottle a few more times and I sat down to think …. I was very naughty as a kid ergo I got spanked quite a bit  ….
then I thought ….hmmmm ...I doubt my parents like me all that much ….and now this Poison …
I am Sure these two are trying to kill me slowly ….ergo I started throwing the orange tablet …
initially I would bury the tablet in the back yard ….then I got bored and used to just chuck it in the back yard which had loads of leaves to hide my orange tablet …
one day when I was at school ….my mother swept the back yard and found a few of my expensive orange poisonous tablets ….
when I reached home from school I got a Lecture on how Dr Shirole is a pvt doctor and how we pay out of my Dad's pocket for treatment under the pvt doctor …. and How expensive the drug, I was throwing away was ….and I had to eat them to get well ….and that poison meant …. it is poisonous to anyone without a Polyp in the stomach …
I listened to my highly agitated parents and kept quite …. I ate them horrendous medicines from then on and believed I was dying a little by just eating them …
however the Opposite happened ….my Polyp went away without Surgery and I was healed ….
however from that time onwards ….I do not like doctors and examinations … plus I throw drugs away …. when I was doing MPhil and was running around for data collection and stuff ...I developed a major hormonal imbalance and was dragged to a lady gynec who was requested to counsel me about my drug throwing ways ….she gave me a stern talk and told me about being a responsible young woman and future mother and loads of jazz
I did not improve … I used to throw prescribed drugs as though my very Life depended on it LOL
except once in a blue moon ...like I eat my drug for hypothyroidism every morning without fail …   

Hill people vs people from the plains .... LOL

when I reached Annamalais ...the husband and I stayed with a senior from their company and I loved it ...as they had quite a few books for safe keeping ..from the Valparai Tea Club which was burned downed ....plus they were north Indians ...ergo I could eat flat bread Every day ....the husband could not zzzzzz because of the flat bread diet at night ...he is a hard core 'rice eater' from Assam ...finally I got sick of his cribbing and I told the lady of the house and we laughed and there was rice served at night too .... I got an earful for being so direct with a Senior and someone I had just met .... in Pune we are Direct as Direct can be ...we call a spade a spade and believe in asking and suggesting things to people Point Blank ....
when I finally shifted to this bungalow of my own ....the person in the snap with my mom and me is Shaktivelu ...he was the cook assigned to this bungalow and the young guy in the first snap wearing the shirt with black and white checks was the gardener...we got just two bungalow help as compared to 7 in Assam ....some companies like The Assam Company Ltd ...the last Tea Company the husband worked for ...assigned 12 househelp initially and was lowered to 10 after a point and that translated to a rise in the payscale for executives ....we women would keep saying how we could do the work the Help do and get that income in cash rather than in kind .....as house help who had moods and egos of their own ...which would lead to much heartache for the Tea Widows aka wives ....most tea women spend most of their time on their own ergo my preference for the word Widow ...
Shaktivelu was an OK cook ...the issue I had with him was ...getting him to wash hands post going to the loo ...I always keep soap in the kitchen for myself and the househelp ... however he would be miserly with the hand washing and it would irk me ....he also liked to chuck things and could go on about stuff ...I ignored him most of the time and we took Ajit, the gardener with us on trips to the town ...as Shaktivelu was quite a grouch on the long trips to town ...
once the husband had to go to Ooty for a training prog for 3 days .... I was ordered to make Shaktivelu zzz in the kitchen and I got a little scared of him and bolted the kitchen door from the pantry side too ....it was irritating as late at night I could not go get some water and stuff from the fridge in the kitchen ....
I decided that I would not allow him to zzzzz in the bungalow the next day as it was a very peacefull night ....no elephants came to the bungalow side and I decided I would take a chance with them elephants IF need be ...however I needed the run of the entire house at night ....plus another assistant who used to stay in that bungalow I was staying in ....arrived at the bungalow gate the next morning and howled at Shaktivelu on top of his voice using Foul words I have Never heard in Public ..he swore in English and Hindi and I wondered if the cook understood those words .... as he only spoke Tamil with a wee bit of English ...as the husband spoke Only English with the househelp in Annamalais ...the tea executive was yelling at Shaktivelu for creating problems for his wife at the Crèche aka Daycare for workers children ...
soon my parents came for a visit and they got a lot of stuff for me from Kerala ...they came to take us to Kerala ...however the husband's boss did not give us leave and the husband never got to see Kerala ...
I shared stuff my parents bought with the househelp ....and by then Ajit, the gardener was staying in the Staff quarters at the back of the bungalow .... and he had the keys to the bungalow ...so that in case there was a company guest he could make the person comfortable in our absence ...that is the rule on T.Estates ...the house is kept spick and span and open at all times ... as those remote estates do not have hotels for company guests to stay and it was the duty of executives to host company guests ...If we had family coming over ...we had to inform the office ...
one thing from Kerala I like very much is called Avloose podi ...it's made with powdered rice and grated coconut which is dry roasted to a pale brown colour and can be stored for a long time ...it can be had either with milk and sugar or with mashed bananas ... for breakfast or as a snack ...
my mom's twin always sends a big packet of it for us siblings everytime some one comes to visit from Kerala ....
one day the husband's boss invited my parents and me and the entire estate for a party ....I was not keen to go as I was petrified of the boss ...a person born and brought up in Kerala however of Punjabi origin ...he was a unique piece of work in a very negative way ....however both he and his wife were very gracious hosts ...of course everyone in Tea... have to be gracious hosts ... however that day before going for the party I forgot to put the tin with the avloos podi in the bedroom and lock it ....the master bedroom is the only room that we can lock and keep the keys for with ourselves ....
when I came back and took the tin for morning breakfast I noticed a big difference in the amount in the tin ...I obviously thought the gardener took it as he is the one with the house keys .... I kept talking about it to my parents in Malayalam and then I told them about how the pilfering of things is 10times worse in Assam ....
my parents left and soon I caught the pilferer red handed and as opposed to what I had thought ...it was the cook Shaktivelu who was going ballistic about everything and one day reported to work Drunk ... I spoke to the lady who used to stay in that bungalow before and she suggested terminating his services immediately ....which I did ...
however ...now the question was who to take on as a cook ....I called the gardener Ajit and had a talk with him ...and I promised to teach him and protect him from the Chinna Dorai's temper too...the husband was called Chinna Dorai aka Little Master ...as the senior Executive is the Dorai or Master ...and I was called Amma aka Mam ...
Ajit the gardener would shiver if the husband was having a tantrum ....ergo I needed to pacify him about No shouting from the Chinna Dorai ....he agreed after a lot of prodding ...I even talked to his wife ...a very sweet girl ...she was happy to be living alone with her hubby for the first time after marriage in the house behind the bungalow.... and I was happy to have them as there was someone IF I needed any help ...
I taught Ajit with patience and was happy to know he knew Malayalam and English too and was a  12grade pass out ....and a bit of an IOH moment too that was ...as he must have understood what I was talking with my parents a few weeks earlier about pilfering....anyways he was very helpfull and could take down notes when the father-in-law called from Assam in our absence ....by now he had the keys to the kitchen and bungalow and he being a very fast learner ...he knew all our preferences and I did not have to wake up at 5.40am to make tea and a snack for the husband ...he would come make stuff and leave and come back at 8ish to make breakfast ...the fallout was ....I used to spend all my time reading and writing and started a course in Taxation laws from a Distance Learning College in Kerala ... and I started gaining weight ... LOL
I used to constantly encourage Ajit to go for higher studies ...I even offered to help him with the course work ...however he kept putting it off ....however with Ajit at home ....as cook and caretaker ....
I could go for club meets and dance practice for the club competitions and Ajit would make cook lunch and serve the Chinna Dorai in my absence .... life was fun and games and peacefull too ....he would handle stuff when I had guests and since he was there I knew the gardener would not pilfer anything either ...he took care of everything
disaster struck when he got chicken pox and his mother wanted him to shift back to the labour lines ...plus she stopped him from coming to the bungalow as it meant late nights ...due to the husband and I getting nominated to represent the Tea Estate for All District club Dos ...we were going for parties during Independence day and every other meet ...which was at a 1 hours drive away from the estate ....soon things started getting worse on the estate and we were going to leave ...I sent word for Ajit's mom and told her I need her son for the little time I was there as he knew stuff and I had a huge amount to do on my hands ....she grudgingly agreed and both Ajit and his wife were sad for me ...as were leaving Annamalais ...
I learnt quite a bit of gardening and home remedies from Ajit and I doubled my advise that he take up higher studies and shift out for better opportunities
that is when Ajit told me about the Hill people and how everyone was simple and kind and hardworking as compared to the people of the plains ...he said he was so used to the air and people of the mountains  ...that he could not adjust to things in the plains ....however he said he was toying with the idea of shifting to Tirupur and joining the Booming hosiery industry ...
soon packing to send stuff to Assam by road started ...and Ajit was a big help as he could read our transfer book and tick stuff for us ....as we packed and we were totally dependent on him ....we planned to leave quite a bit of things for his family and him .... however the gardener who came into the house rarely ...started playing up and a week before leaving the gardener took the weight of the pressure cooker ....and I discussed with Ajit how we would have to pay the price of the pressure cooker IF we do not get the weight in time ...quite a bit of the stuff in the bungalow starting from linen, crockery, cutlery and the mixer grinder too belonged to Parry Agro the tea company the husband worked for ....
Again Ajit told me his thing about people from the plains and how the gardener was from the plains ergo he pilfered ...and how a Hill Dweller would never steal .....
Finally I hit upon a brilliant idea...I told the gardener the amount that would have to be paid for a missing weight was the price of a new pressure cooker ...ergo ... I would leave the estate and the company would deduct the amount from the gardener's salary .... best solution I had hit upon !!! LOL ....
the gardener found the weight of the pressure cooker in the evening in the trash bin ....LAMO

however from that time onwards... I would Notice... how people from certain areas tend to be more honest .... Hill Dwellers and Islanders belong to this group ... :) 

the time i nearly drowned ...

when I was in first year of Kindergarten ...it was this school called Balniketan...run by the 9th BRD ie base repair depot ...the place my dad worked .....it was a simple school and I did not take to it ...if I went to school I would get out of class and go sit with a Bhagya Aunty ...my dad's friend's wife who taught in that school .... she was very fond of me and would let me sit on the table in her class ..... the trip to and from school was the worst part ....there was a mallu boy a year or so older than me ...who helped me in the transport ....during break time I would go speak to him in Malayalam ....
a few months into schooling and I started Howling to use the truck to go to school ...it was a truck made by some company and was called Shaktimaan ...I hated the sight of the creepy olive green bus in the morning ...kids would stamp and kick each other on the way to school ....after a point my parents got fed up of my howling as my mom had to carry my younger brother and drop me to the bus stop ....I think it became a headache for her too and I got to stay at home and be taught by my dad ...for the entrance test to senior KG in my elder sister's school run by the Jesus and Mary Congregation ....life was Blissfull for some time.... I was just 4 and a half
during that time when I was home ...my dad's elder sister's husband who was a Signal Inspector with the railways came home for a visit as he had come for some work to Pune ...he was posted in Igatpuri a hill station in Maharashtra ...
he just asked politely and jokingly if I would want to go visit their house in the hills ...and I was thrilled to have an adventure away from studying at home ....I said I would love to go ...he said in that case you will have to wake up at 5.30 am tomorrow and I was all OK with anything and everything ....my dad was cool about it however my mom didn't want me to go ....next day a wee little bag was packed for me and off I went ....
it was my first journey on the Mumbai Pune train line ....and then we took a diversion somewhere midway ....I still remember travelling in the guards compartment of the goods train to Igatpuri ...
their house was a very cute colonial bungalow ...with wrought a iron staircase joining the upper storey and down ...there was a Sikh family staying upstairs ...I had a gala time playing with my cousin sister and brother and their neighbours ...Bubbly and Pinky...names I found quite quaint ....

my brother was some 12 years older than me and sister is 4years older than me ...my cousin would make his sister cry every morning when going to school ...and I would wonder why he would tease her sooo ...my aunt would use khol on my sister's eyebrows and eyes every morning and she would cry ....immediately my aunt would turn to me and ask ....your mom also does this every morning right ....and I would nod in affirmation....I don't think my sister liked me doing that ...
they had a very unique system in the bathroom ....there was a cemented area for filling water and one could bathe a small kid there or as my aunt did ...she stored water there for an emergency ...in case there was some shortage ....somehow that tank used to fascinate and scare my cousin sister and me ...

that is the first time I had krvande and jamuns ....big juicy purple coloured Delicious jamuns  ...they had an enormous tree in the garden ....and we cousins gorged on it ....plus raw mangoes with salt and cayenne pepper ....that is also the place I saw crabs for the first time ....my uncle got crabs one day and he emptied the live crabs in the water tank in the bathroom and I was hooked to watching them ...that sister of my dad's did not stay in her parent's house when she was growing up ....her paternal uncle who worked as a Station Master and was an expert in the Queen's language took her to his house as my aunt was very good at school and he wanted her to excel ...ergo my aunt was a trained teacher when she got married ...the fallout was ...she always felt a little estranged from her sisters and brothers except my dad of course ...who is a paragon of virtue and is kind to everyone ...even his dad's second wife ...most of my uncles and aunts ignored my second paternal grandmother ....
another problem due to my aunt concentrating on her studies is that she did not know much of cooking when she got married ...however my uncle since he was a bachelor for quite some time was a good cook ...he helped his wife ...in their house my uncle Only cleaned the fish and non veg ...ergo he showed my cousins and me ...the entire process of cleaning crabs and my aunt cooked it ....it tasted delicious and I was hooked to crustaceans Ever since ....
a few days later I had a nose bleed ...I was soooo used to my nose bleed as it was common for me during extreme cold and extreme heat ....however my aunt and everyone at her home and her neighbours got sooo very flustered with the nose bleed ....I was amused at the running around and fawning over me ....I let it go on for a bit and then got worried for my aunt and told her ...I know how this stops ...I just need to put my head raised and lean backward and need a bit of ice on my forehead ....soon it stopped and everyone thought I was a smart kid ...LOL I was just used to my problem ...
the next weekend my uncle decided to take all of us and their friends and neighbours and go to a dam near their place for a picnic ...specially since they wanted to show me around ....so off we went ....when playing in the lake near the dam ...I slipped and fell in and started floating away ....luckily one of the kids saw me and started screaming ...and my uncle lunged and caught hold of my hair and held on and slowly pulled me out of the water ....that was the second big scare I gave them ....

by this time a month had passed and my dad wrote to ask about how I was doing .... I never missed anyone ...however when my uncle asked me if I wanted to go home ...I said I was ok ....their house had more kids for me to play with ....after a second letter from Pune ...my uncle took me along with him on his next official trip to Pune ....they got transferred to Mumbai soon after ....and I have never visited Igatpuri ever since ....once when coming from Assam we took the Mumbai bound train and I passed by Igatpuri ...a place where I had nearly drowned as a wee little kid ...

going to Mumbai was lots of fun during my growing up years and they too would come home often ...life was so very simple and fun those days ....during school I used to fight with my cousin brother from Mumbai as he would call me haddi meaning bones ....as I was very scrawny ...once I told him stop or else I will crush your specs ....he called me haddi and I went up to him and took his specs and stamped it and Broke it ....all hell broke loose as he had a high number and could not go back without his specs ....my dad lost his cool with me and I was grounded and got AN EAR FULL ....iohhhh that was 4 much ....
he joined the railwyas just like his dad ..and in the same dept ...he was our official lawyer ...if we needed something my parents were against ...I would go to the railways signals office and call him ....many times he would give us siblings pocket money as he was working when we were in school and college ... his sister and I would share our secrets and she taught me how to bleach my face .... she and I would binge watch movies when I went over ...and I would take her around Pune when she came over ....
nothing in those innocent and fun years prepared us for the tragedy ahead ... my cousin brother's 3 year old daughter got meningitis and lost her motor and speech skills ...he turned to Christianity and became a pastor in no time ...a very generous, charismatic and fun loving soul he was ...he lost his daughter in 2016 and he did the ground work to start a girls orphanage in Mumbai ...when he was murdered for converting a family following Islam .... the person just wanted to scare him but his near blow became a weird actual blow and my cousin passed away by accident ....
my cousin sister and I would talk a huge amount those days and I went and was there for her on the day of the funeral ...he was buried and now is survived by his wife and little son ....a carbon copy of him .... both my uncle and aunt passed away sooner than expected and now there is just my sister with whom I communicate on and off ....
life is so very unpredictable and not once does it give us any forewarning about the road ahead .... I so regret not going to meet him before he passed ...after he turned a born again Christian ...most of the family had cut him out ...and I felt sad about it .....however I am glad that thanks to the 1st MLM I joined ...I used to call him quite a bit in 2014 and we had started talking to each other and writing to each other on FB on my second account .... once he passed some of cousins started stoopid dialogues on FB about that cousin who had helped everyone ....ergo I deactivated that FB account which was for family and friends ...and it is deactivated to this day ..... 

Bangles .....

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Bangles in India are worn traditionally by married women ..... it is a sign of matrimony among the married women ...traditionally speaking 

however ….one can see bangles adorning the hands of the unmarried, married , young and old alike .... bangles tend to keep the nerves of the hands functioning properly as the keep rubbing the wrists when women move their hands be it for work or tying their tresses or anything else ..

my affair with bangles, specially glass bangles.... started when I was 4 years old ....on a trip to Kerala ...my maternal uncle's wife bought bangles for her daughter and me ....my cousin and I used to have long conversations about our Precious glass bangles ....when I went to my paternal granny's place ...her youngest son and my uncle broke All my bangles ....saying only fisherwomen wore glass bangles ....I howled the roof down and went and told everyone who would listen ...how my paternal uncle Babu chachan broke my bangles ....and nicked my hand too ...he was the lone alcoholic in the family and was used to throwing wild tantrums...everyone of my aunts ticked him off for troubling little me ....they told him that as long as her parents don't object ...you stop meddling and making the child howl sooo loudly ...LOL 

my granny yelled at him and asked the househelp to buy me a dozen ...I told her ...I wanted just as many as I had earlier ....both hands should be full ...she very kindly obliged and I got 24 glass bangles which I flaunted to everyone including the uncle who would threaten to break them again...they would not be such an attraction one back in Pune as they were an impediment to tree climbing ....my favourite way to spend my time .... climbing the guava trees in the backyard and via the trees climbing the high roof ...

every summer going to Kerala and buying bangles and wearing them and fighting about them was a ritual ...once back to Pune ...there was no way I could wear any fancy stuff or bangles to school which had strict policies about uniform ..the only allowance in school was small studs as earrings and that too ...no fancy gold or diamond studded earrings

once I reached college I would buy all kinds of glass bangles from the roadside stalls near my bus stop ...I had very few traditional indian clothes ....and for each of those dresses I had matching glass bangles ...I had quite a collection by the time I finished college ...

work was in a college and we had a dress code of the Sari for college ....I would buy minimum 12 bangles to match each saree ..however I wore only 6 or so when going to college as it was a headache when drawing graphs and diagrams ....

then came marriage and gold bangles ....wore for a bit ...in assam and then we were transferred to Annamalais ....and I went back to wearing saris and glass bangles ...

in the snaps above there is one snap with two guys ...one is Ajit and the other is Sunil

Ajit (in checked clothes) was the gardener ...i trained him to be the cook and he took to it very well ...since he had finished 12grade ...he could talk to relatives in English and keep notes for us ...when we were away for events ...
Very honest and helpfull ... when we left he was going to shift to Tirupur with family to work in the hoisery market
Sunil was from the plains i.e Pollachi and he was the gardener, he also did shopping for me and both of them helped me buy glass bangles ...spl for parties ..i would give them the blouse to match the colour and a bangle of my size ....i collected quite a bit of glass bangles in this estate at Sheikalmudi ... LOL

In 1999 December we left Annamalais and I stopped buying glass bangles in Assam till I was back in 2004 ....serious buying ofbangles started when I was back to teaching in a college and wearing saris ....I used to keep buying bangles on every trip to the coastal regions of India and every picnic place we went to ...

Finally in 2012 I stopped buying glass bangles as they were not available in Bahrain ...there I bought chuncky bracelets of the junk jewellery kind ...

I was back to India in 2013 and I went back to buying glass bangles and it is Only in 2015 on a trip to Pondicherry that I stopped buying stuff I would not use ....I gave away many bangles and have curbed my glass bangles buying ways totally ....as of now ...

they are Translucent circles that tinkle and chime when I work ... they are a huge fascination for me and I love more than gold bangles any Day ...

from 2014 I have started buying silver bangles ....they too are a fascinating world altogether different in nature and type ....Jaipur is one place where one can find a huge variety and beautifull designs at half the price from what I pay in my city Pune ...

PS : Bangles also brings to mind a Band ...whose music I love very much ....manic Monday and walk like an Egyptian ...  :) :)